10 Things You Can’t Tolerate in a Relationship
Relationships in a couple are not an easy thing: almost all unions face serious strength tests, experience crises and difficulties.
As a rule, the ability to show patience, understanding and sympathy helps to overcome all obstacles and smooth out sharp corners. However, there are things that should not be tolerated in a relationship under any circumstances.
Together with Colady, we study what should not be tolerated in a relationship with a partner.
1 Treason
Surprisingly, when faced with infidelity, many women immediately try to justify their partner’s act, coming up with all sorts of excuses:
- It is my fault;
- all men are polygamous;
- he did not want;
- it happened by itself, etc.
In such cases, you need to remember one simple truth: we are people, not animals, we must be aware of our actions, control our actions and be responsible for them.
No weaknesses, instincts and polygamy do not justify treason. The person showed disrespect to you and your union, you need to accept this as a fact.
2 Abuse
Abuse, that is, violence in any form – physical or mental – is an unequivocal reason for breaking off relations.
Unfortunately, many women are still trying to find an excuse for such actions:
- "He will mend";
- "He won’t be anymore";
- "It is my fault".
Never make excuses for a tyrant and an abuser: such a person will never change, and those around him are not to blame for his tyrannical inclinations.
3 Gender dictatorship
Oddly enough, gender dictatorship – absolute and uncompromising subordination to a man – is not only not condemned in our society, but is also perceived as a norm. Like, a “real man" should command, and a woman should obey.
It is difficult to say why archaic stereotypes still flourish, but one thing we know for sure: in modern society, such a gender hierarchy is unacceptable.
The man who commands everyone in the house "for the simple reason that he is a man" actually demonstrates the qualities of a tyrant and a narcissist, and not a real man.
4 Consumer attitude
He plays with pleasure the borscht you have prepared, but then he doesn’t even bother to say a banal “thank you”, he takes the things you freshly ironed and doesn’t even think to thank him, picks up a lot of purchases and doesn’t take a single bag in his hands, and in the evenings reclines on the sofa while you cook, wash, clean.
Congratulations, you have come across a classic example of a consumer attitude, when parasitism appears instead of love. And it can be called anything:
- "women’s duties";
- "it’s easy for you";
- "I’m tired at work", etc.
No matter how your partner justifies their behavior, the meaning does not change.
5 Inability to compromise
Sometimes he resembles a capricious child and begins to take offense, stomp his feet, slam doors, hardly anything goes the way he would like, and he did not hear about any concessions at all: only the way he needs it, period!
Yes, at the very beginning of a relationship, this may seem like a trifle, but if you plan to build a family with this person, then there is something to think about: family life is always compromises and mutual concessions.
Are you ready to live for years by someone else’s rules, adjusting to someone’s desires and whims?
6 Desecration
Everything that you do, your partner considers nonsense, an insignificant trifle that does not deserve attention and praise. He speaks with disdain about your work, criticizes your hobby, does not value your work and achievements.
Did you recognize your boyfriend or husband in this description? Think about parting: such a person not only does not appreciate your work, but also does not respect you as a person.
7 Distrust
You seem to have done nothing wrong, but his regular interrogations, checks and distrustful looks make you constantly feel guilty, accountable and justified.
Let’s face it: normal, healthy relationships always involve trust in a partner. If it is not there, then one can hardly speak of love.
8 Blackmail
He prefers a much simpler (and effective, as it seems to him) form of conversation to a productive dialogue – blackmail.
Moreover, this technique can be used both in simple everyday situations (“If you cook rice, I won’t have dinner at all!”), And in larger ones (“If you don’t lose weight, I’ll divorce you!”).
Do not succumb to such provocations, and even better, break off relations with such a person, because a blackmailer is the same moral abuser.
9 Total control
Another form of abuse is total control. Moreover, it is often presented under the sauce of some kind of care and manifestation of “love”: they say, I am your husband and should know what you are doing at the moment, what you are spending a pretty penny on and who you are talking to.
Everything can start with seemingly harmless questions “Where were you, why didn’t you answer the call”, and then develop into a suffocating total control with isolation from friends, acquaintances and a ban on any independence.
10 The habit of being ashamed of you
He assures that he loves you, but stubbornly does not introduce you to friends and relatives, does not introduce you into his circle, asks you not to come to his office, forbids publishing joint photos, in a word, hides from the whole world.
If your partner is not married, then this behavior says only one thing: he is ashamed of you. You can, of course, start looking for reasons and accuse yourself of ugliness / stupidity / unworthiness.
But let’s turn on common sense: what kind of love is it when a partner is ashamed of his girlfriend? It’s not about you, it’s about how he treats you.