“Do not need to be served”: why women choose loneliness

Often loneliness is not a hopelessness, but a personal choice. Some people choose a bachelor life completely voluntarily: some of them are not initially aimed at marriage, and someone has already been fettered by unbreakable bonds and no longer wants to. Rambler found out why women choose loneliness.

More time for yourself and children

Often women say that the value of relationships with men is minimal. Husbands do not help them around the house, do not raise children, and even after a divorce they do not pay alimony. Girls lose motivation to start new relationships, as they cope with everything on their own.

“I ended up in a relationship because I didn't see any benefit in them, everyone told me that it was necessary to find a man, only good from him? I divorced my husband and started raising my sons on my own. The husband never helped, so after parting it became even easier to live. No need to serve another "child". And the absence of quarrels and healthy nerves helped me become a great mom."

Relationships are hard

Relationships invariably lead to the fact that we are somehow dependent on a partner. Any closeness gives both positive and negative emotions. We are sad when there are quarrels or a partner has problems. Unfortunately, the pros don't outweigh the cons in some respects.

“I've been single most of my life and the time I've been in a relationship has been terrible. I either coped with the absence of a partner, or suffered because of him, there was no third way. It always seemed to me that loneliness is not scary, because I am with a person who really cares about me – myself, and this is better than living with someone who makes you cry and sacrifice everything for an incomprehensible goal.

Frustration associated with violence

Negative experiences also influence women's decision to enter into relationships. For this reason, many women are victims of their partners. Without a psychologist, it is impossible to cope with such injuries.

“I'm scared that I'll fall in love with a man who will beat me, rape me, call me names and cheat on me. The whole male sex scares the hell out of me!”

Life for yourself

Others just like to live the way they want. Still, relationships imply some obligations and stability. Yes, you can find a partner who will also be easy-going, but it is much more difficult to do this. The vast majority of people hardly leave their homes.

“My life is marked by impermanence. The fact is that I never stay in one place for more than a couple of months. I move from one country to another. It makes long-term relationships impossible, and I honestly want to live for myself.”

Loneliness is independence

Women have become more independent. The financial situation is equalized, psychologically women feel more secure, and therefore they choose loneliness. By the way, the percentage of lonely people in developed countries is higher precisely because people are able to survive alone. At the same time, relationships always develop according to one scenario: meeting, falling in love and intensity, recession and crisis. People don't want to spend time on this.

“Being alone is a kind of therapy, a cleansing that every girl must go through in order to not only learn how to take care of herself on her own, but also rethink the values ​​​​in relationships. I make all my decisions myself and do not depend on anyone. It's not loneliness, it's freedom."