When you walk, communication will pass without problems, if you plan the conversation in advance. Many believe that only public figures can have this skill, but this is not the case.

Everyone can learn the ability to speak without pauses and hesitations on any topic. To learn the basics of easy communication, listen to the following recommendations:

Communicate more with different people. In a store, restaurant, transport – everywhere try to strike up a conversation with strangers. This skill will help you not to get nervous on a date.

Read more books, watch documentaries and feature films. The better the horizons are developed, the easier it is to find a topic for conversation.
Record your thoughts on the recorder. Analysis of your own speech will help identify mistakes that need to be worked on.
Good improvisation is one that doesn’t cause panic. In any conversation, be prepared for unforeseen situations. Practice at home with the exercise: write different words on the pieces of paper, shuffle them and pull out any 5. Tie them together, intertwine topics, create an original conversation.
Before your date, think about the topics you will be discussing. Try to predict different options for the course of the conversation and your next steps.

What question to ask a guy to interest him?

Psychologists say that in order to arouse real interest in yourself, you first need to show a genuine interest in the other person. In correspondence, this can be done with the help of questions that touch the deeper feelings of a man, show interest in him as a person.

What do you value most in life?
Have you ever wanted to live forever?
Do you believe that there is someone from above who is wiser than us?
Describe your ideal day?
What do you most thank life for?
Tell me a couple of sentences about your life?
What ability or talent do you most dream of having?
Do you want to know your future?
What do you value most in people?
Was your childhood happy?
What would you like to change in your life?
What can bring you to tears?
Do you think there are things that shouldn’t be joked about?
What are you most afraid of in life?
Do you have anything that you always dreamed of doing, but didn’t?

If you see that a guy answers your questions in detail, confidently, with examples, then he likes to communicate with you, he is interested.

What to talk about when the topics are over

When the topics for conversation are over, panic arises in my head. Use a selection of topics to help you catch your breath and smooth out awkward intellectual stupor.

Discuss the film

If a girl is out with a boy for the first time, talking about your favorite movies is a great way to get to know each other better.

Information about positive and negative characters will help to find out the desires of the young man, as well as his shadow essence.

In addition, there are a lot of situations in the cinema that you can discuss or play the game “And if you were in the hero’s place.”

Ask how your day went

It is always nice when there is a person who is interested in the events of the passing day. Show the man an interest in him and his work. Perhaps he needs advice or wants to share his joy. This is a great way to build trust and involve yourself in a guy’s life.

Sooner or later he will miss the cute phrase: “How was your day?” Then he will begin to talk about it himself without additional questions.

Look around: topics for communication around you

If you don’t know what to discuss, then take a look around. The world is able to present not only endless possibilities, but also a lot of topics for discussion :

Talk about nature: about trees, recreation, favorite parks and reserves.
Dream together while looking at the clouds. As in childhood, try to turn on your imagination and look in the sky for familiar objects from the white “heavenly fluff”.
Discuss the history of the city and streets.
Observe people, their behavior and image. This topic can easily turn into a discussion of fashion trends and everyday habits.

Everything that surrounds is worthy of attention. Look around carefully and improvise.

Ask about a hobby

On your first walk with your boyfriend, bring up hobbies and interests. This is a win-win.

Men usually prefer to play sports, go fishing, play billiards or computer games at their leisure. Feel free to praise a guy for his hobby accomplishments. Telling about your favorite hobbies will help the man choose places to date in the future.

Should I write to him first?

Often, girls are afraid to start communicating even through social networks. But there is nothing complicated about it. This is more effective than just waiting for the lover to decide to strike up a conversation with you. In the event that you are not at all familiar with him, there is no other way out – you need to write. If you miss your chance for a romantic relationship, you will regret it bitterly.

Interestingly, in Japan, girls are usually the first to strike up communication with the opposite sex. There are many advantages to this, for example, couples in which the girls were initiators are less likely to get divorced. This is why you shouldn’t be afraid to take the initiative.

Reasons to start dating a guy you like

So, you have already decided to write to the chosen one, but do not know where to start. You need a reason to start communication. To do this, decide what you have in common:

Pay attention to his page on the social network. Perhaps you have mutual acquaintances or you previously worked or studied in the same place. All this provides interesting topics for discussion.
Find common interests. Ask about your literary or musical tastes. Explore the communities the young person is in. But if it seems that there are no common themes, this is not a reason to give up.
Ask your guy what he thinks about the upcoming premiere of a popular movie. Ask if he was in the movies, if he liked the picture. If he hasn’t watched the movie, ask him for advice.

If you like a young man, it is imperative to take the initiative. The advice of psychologists will help to strike up a long and interesting conversation with him.

There are several ways to meet a guy on the Internet. Let’s find out how you can start a conversation with a guy in VK.

Pay attention to the examples of the most effective phrases for this case:

Ask the guy directly: “Hi! Do you mind getting to know each other? ” This will immediately indicate your intentions, and the young man will definitely react.
Be sincere. Write: “I know that you and I do not know each other. I wanted to chat with an interesting person, I decided to write to you. Let’s keep in touch!”. It is unlikely that the interlocutor will refuse.
Come up with a reason. Ask the guy on VKontakte: “Can you advise me on an interesting book? So sad, I want to be distracted. It seems to me that I have already read everything in the world … “. Of course, this is not usually written to strangers. But this may intrigue the guy, he will be interested in who you are and how you found out about him.
Write your opinion about one of the posts of the young man. Try to say something encouraging, positive. Ask what he liked about the book he read or how impressed he was at the band’s concert he attended.

Topics for conversation

When a guy reads your message and responded to it, it will become clear whether it is worth continuing to communicate. If a young man says that he does not want to get acquainted, because he is in a relationship, then this is not your option. Apologize and turn your attention to someone else.

If the man was happy to answer the questions and decided to continue the conversation, then he likes you. This interest can be fueled with engaging conversation. Pick the right theme and get started:

If the young person has an unusual hobby, such as cooking, rope jumping, or playing the French horn, ask for more information. Men are happy to share their hobbies and love to be admired.
Ask where your chosen one vacationed, what impressed him. Find out what kind of vacation he prefers – extreme or more measured. Ask if he likes to swim and sunbathe on the beach or if he likes excursions and active leisure.
Discuss theater plays, films, and interesting exhibitions in the city. First, ask if the young person is interested in any of the above. Chat about novelties in literature.

Also find out what the guy likes and then tell about yourself. But don’t go overboard, guys don’t like chatty girls very much.

How to keep the conversation going

If you’re in real life with a guy, keeping the conversation going is easy too. A good place to chat can be anything – a cafe, a gym, or even a public transport stop.

You can conduct a conversation as follows:

Don’t be afraid to approach a stranger and start a conversation. Say, for example: “Hello! My name is Olga! And you?”. Memorize the guy’s name and repeat it several times. It will be pleasant to the interlocutor.
Take action as appropriate. Complain that the minibus does not travel for a long time, ask his opinion about whether it will rain. Even an ordinary conversation with a man about the weather leads to a lengthy, interesting conversation.
A good option is to ask the guy for help with something. For example, carry heavy bags, hold the door. This will be a great opportunity for a new acquaintance to show their strength. Do not forget to say “Thank you!” At the end.
Guys love compliments, so don’t skimp on them. Praise his figure, note the interesting scent of perfume, fashionable stylish clothes.

Don’t drag out your conversation. It will be ideal if you leave unexpectedly. Refer to the fact that they are waiting for you at home or you are in a hurry to meet with your friends. Be sure to smile at the other person goodbye and tell them how nice it was to talk to him. If a guy likes you, he will want to continue the conversation – he will ask for your phone number or offer to meet again.

Question options

It is not worth communicating only on abstract topics. If you managed to start communication with a young man, ask him the right questions. So you will be able to get to know the interlocutor well, but on condition that you listen to him carefully.

If you are incompetent on some issues, offer to talk about something else.

Girls can not always immediately understand how to talk to the interlocutor and what to communicate with him.

We offer several leading questions that will help you get to know a man better:

Do you believe in transmigration of souls? Who would you like to be in your next life?
What do you do in your free time? How do you like to relax?
Which is closer to you – villages or big cities? Would you like to live in an apartment or a private house?
Which country or city abroad would you like to visit?
Which religious trend is closer to you?

Do not be intrusive so that he does not get bored. When asking questions, listen carefully to what the young man is answering. This will help you get to know the chosen one better and determine how much he suits you. If your views on life are too conflicting, consider whether you need to continue communicating in a romantic way.

Possible mistakes

When dealing with a nice guy, girls often get lost and make many mistakes. Before starting a conversation with a young man you like, check out the proven recommendations:

You cannot interrupt during a conversation. Girls make this mistake quite often. But even if you like to talk, it’s better to listen more in order to please the man.
Be direct. If you hint at something to a guy, he will think that you are manipulating him.
Don’t complain about problems in your life and a bad family.
Don’t talk about your illnesses. This is not the most pleasant topic for first dates.
You don’t need to think over the conversation in advance. Keep your communication light and relaxed.

If a young man has invited you to go out with him, you do not need to take a friend on a date. She can turn his attention to herself, as a result, you will lose a potential suitor.

Guys and men are two big differences.

In general, young people, they are quite primitively arranged and they constantly blunt with terrible force. This is such a crude device that it is difficult for them to convey something in a subtle way. I am talking about myself as well.

I myself matured rather late to be happy in my family life. And before that I had a wind in my head. Of course, I fell in love and loved, but thoughts about the offspring did not go further than the bed with the girl. It is the creation of a family in which children are born and brought up.

I was not ready for this for a very long time, I matured after 30. The body also behaved very interestingly. My shirts became small, but before that my shoulders were much narrower. I then had the feeling that my body was filled with greater strength, matured.

As if the body of a man, he, too, is ripe for a man at this age to have a family, children. It is likely that in men this is inherent not only in the psyche, but also in the physical body. This idea of the nature of the male body echoes my feelings and personal experience.

If you look at it, for some reason, many families that were created by young guys and girls fell apart after their children grew up. And then such men for some reason create a second family.

Why do men suddenly go to young ones

Previously, this did not fit in my head, but time passed and only recently Mikhail Bogomolnikov opened my eyes to this question. Guys, unlike girls, they mature much later for a serious long-term relationship, for a family. Ripen already somewhere after 30-35 years.

They mature, the body changes and becomes more so deeply rooted and this person is already a man. So a guy, a young man becomes a man in his physical form. He just matured to have a family, he became a husband. And it often happens that by this time the relationship with his first wife, whom he married in his youth, they had already bent.

The children grew up, went to institutes, fledged. A man leaves an old family, meets a young girl, they have a baby and now he has a new family. Such a man just got married early that first time. And when he is already ripe, he already has grown-up children.

Such a man has already seen a lot. He is experienced in both work and love. And he knows for sure that he wants a family, children. At this age, he already has both housing and financial prosperity, so that the family does not need him for anything. And besides everything else, he has already walked a lot and he wants constancy, loyalty, comfort, home. And there is also a bonus: he knows a lot about romance

Psychology of young people from A to Z without embellishment

As for young people, their minds are very primitive. The guy doesn’t think about starting a family. He thinks about some of his hobbies and personal goals. And regarding girls, he thinks about sex.

He wants it very much. This is a young organism, full of strength and energy. And his genitals are working to the fullest. He really needs it. That’s when he really wants to go to the toilet – about the same for him.

You don’t need to close your eyes to this. You need to understand the psychology of a young person. After all, he is very stupid in matters of relationships compared to girls of the same age. He does not understand subtle hints. He doesn’t understand simple hints. And he does not understand even rude hints.

Zadornov once one of his listeners sent a letter in which she describes such a situation. The girl called on a date, invited a guy to her place. And he said to him: “Look at the pharmacy and buy something for tea.” And what do you think he brought? He brought in hematogen.

And a more direct, thick hint that you need to buy condoms and we will spend this night with you. It is difficult to imagine a cruder hint. But girls cannot speak more openly. There are certain manners and a girl she can say something, but something not.

And over this story at Zadornov’s concerts, the people were laughing all the way. Blessed memory of him – this is a cool guy. And you have to understand that young men are really so primitive – they don’t understand a damn thing.

And I also had a bunch of stories in my youth and youth, when I was stupid in the same way, or even worse. Girls they already tried and that, but I was blunt frankly

How to start chatting with a guy: a trick that works 100%

Still, it is necessary to attract guys somehow. It means that we must start communicating with them. You can talk to them, but they will never understand what the girl wants to convey to them. That she is in love, loves, wants affection and so on.

And the young man is generally a crazy dude, he doesn’t understand a damn thing. How, after all, it is possible to convey to a young man to bend him into your arms.

Yes, you understand that even if you tell him directly: “let’s go make love,” for example. Or “I love you” – even in this case he may not understand. Well, at least when the girls practically told me that, I didn’t understand.

And here there is the only remedy, the only thing that can correct the situation. This is a woman’s body, covered with clothing in the right places. Feminine charm: languid gaze, movement, gait.

A young man, he has a lot of strength, a lot of health. Lots of energy, including sexual energy. He really wants to. He may not have other thoughts at all in his head when he is next to the subject of his ardent passion. What can you do to attract a guy.

Girls’ shirts can work great. If you look at the old dresses: there is necessarily a neckline: the neck, the upper part of the chest and the top of the breasts are exposed. Such a triangle in the form of an inverted heart is obtained.

Breasts are very attractive for men and even more so for guys. And if, for example, you unbutton one other button on the top of a shirt, it will be a hell of a draw.

Or, for example, the skirt is not very long – it also attracts attention. Legs are slender. This also leads to intimate places, the gaze is therefore attracted tightly. These are some of the few things a man reacts to.

The very moment it works on him

In addition to the outright blockhead of guys in everything related to relationships with girls. There are also mental cockroaches. For example, I had one particularly big problem. I could not be with those girls who I really like very much, which I really loved. Arkady and I worked on these for a very long time, and, in the end, we got this thing out of the way.

And I don’t know how much the cleavage, well-aimed shooting with the eyes and even more frank things would help here. But in any case, in fact, there is nothing wrong with starting a conversation with a guy. It is not at all necessary to do it compulsively. You can and neatly so. There is such a principle: touch and release.

The fact is that if something is imposed very strongly, then it causes rejection. And if you do it little by little, without overdoing it, then it tends to attract. You touched him and went away, touched him again and moved away – so several times. And he will reach for you.

This is a universal technique, it works not only for girls and guys. For example, you give a book to a person and ask: “Do you want to see the book?” He: “I don’t know, come on”. “But I won’t give it to you,” and you quickly put away the book. And he will immediately want – he can even reach for her.

And here is some kind of mystery, some understatement – such things, they can work very well. After all, the most attractive, for example, is not at all the open parts of the body, but those that are hidden by clothes. A man joins the game: starts to fantasize – that’s where he got caught

And at the same time use the charm of the female body. It seems like a second or third button can accidentally be unbuttoned. And then zip up. And so gradually the guy can be shaken to some decisive action. To make him want to talk to you.

Why and in what cases a girl should take the first step

Modern women are divided into two camps: some believe that a man should take the first step, others – on the contrary. But there are some points that explain why a girl should strike up a conversation first:

the situation will be under the control of the lady;
time is saved;
men will love it;
variety will be introduced into life.

When a woman sits and waits for the first step from a young man, she may not wait. Taking the initiative into her own hands, she controls the situation and independently disposes of life. Another plus of being the first to start a conversation with a guy is time savings. She will immediately know by his response whether he is interested in him. Perhaps the guy is embarrassed to come up first, or he already has a companion.

Many men appreciate the courage of the girls who come up to you to start a conversation first. They are pleased to know that they liked the lady. This allows them to relax and behave naturally during the conversation. The woman who takes the initiative becomes even more attractive.

Even if the man did not reciprocate, such an attempt will become a valuable experience for the young lady, because over time it will become easier for her to make acquaintances with representatives of the opposite sex.

How to take the initiative

In order to boldly approach a man for the purpose of acquaintance and start a conversation with him, you need to mentally prepare yourself, draw up a conversation plan in your mind. Themes are chosen neutral.

Prepare mentally for the conversation

To begin with, it is worth collecting preliminary information about the young man. You can find out what he enjoys and what he likes to do in his free time with mutual friends or on the page in VK. This will facilitate dialogue and arouse the gentleman’s interest.

You also need to prepare a story about yourself. If the conversation takes place on the network, then you should tidy up your personal page: put a good avatar, delete unnecessary posts, post suitable ones. A conversation plan drawn up will help build a dialogue. One should concentrate not on sensations, but on topics of conversation: what you want to know, what result to come to.

Get his attention with any request

When it is difficult to approach a man to find out his name, you can disguise your desire to meet. For example, you can ask him what stop the desired store is located at, how long it takes to get to it. When you meet at the supermarket, you can ask for help to choose a perfume for your dad or brother, change money. At school, to start communicating with a guy, a request to help bring the textbooks to the library is fine.

Don’t talk about your feelings right away.

Getting acquainted with a man, one should abandon the idea of confessing sympathy or love to him. The guys perceive these words as a transition to a serious level of relations. When the interlocutor is not ready for them, confessions will frighten him off. He will stop answering calls, messages. A man with high self-esteem will have the impression that all the ladies fall at his feet if the girl is the first to confess her feelings to him.

Chat on neutral topics

It is best to discuss simple topics with a man: hobbies, sports, films. Perhaps there are mutual acquaintances who will be a good lead for establishing a conversation. Only gossip must be discarded. It is better to discuss how they met them, where they now study, work, live. A topic for conversation about a hobby, place of study or work is suitable. If the hobbies coincide, you can invite the guy to spend time together, for example, go to a concert or go fishing.

Why is it so hard to start talking

Every woman has come across such a situation when a person likes it, but it is somehow inconvenient to speak to him first. Words are immediately lost, excitement arises, often a stupor occurs when it is impossible to utter a word. Why is this happening? It would seem, what is difficult in starting a conversation? In fact, it can be very difficult.

First of all, the reason lies in the indifference to the man. Women only get uncomfortable when they like a guy. After all, they are afraid to seem frivolous, funny, stupid and thereby scare away the object of sympathy from themselves.

It should be noted that not only psychological factors, but also physiological ones, play an important role. The fact is that during contact with a person who is not indifferent to us, adrenaline is produced in our body. Because of it, the following occurs:

excitement;
rapid heartbeat;
profuse sweating;
labored breathing.

Such manifestations, purely physically, interfere with starting a conversation. Not all women experience a high adrenaline rush. This usually occurs in shy, insecure girls. But sometimes it happens with those who behave smartly and confidently with people, but, having met the man of their dreams, they completely forget all the words, they begin to get lost.

Other reasons may lie in the following:

Education. Perhaps the girl was brought up in severity, so she is afraid to show emotions first, she feels fear of a relationship.
Psychological trauma. For example, as a child, the daughter often noticed that her mother was suffering from aggression, disrespect from her father, so she might develop an antipathy towards the stronger sex. Or the woman herself had a negative experience in relationships in the past, as a result of which it is now difficult for her to decide on new connections.
Low self-esteem. Difficulties with communication can also arise due to the fact that a girl considers herself unworthy of a guy, for example, not beautiful or smart enough for him. Therefore, starting a conversation for her becomes a very big act, which is difficult to decide on.

Many girls, due to their character, find it difficult to overcome themselves and be the first to make contact, so they always wait for the initiative from the opposite sex.

How to talk to a guy

There are several options for starting a conversation with a man. Which one to choose is up to you, depending on the situation.

Say hello, introduce yourself

First of all, say hello to the object of your liking. If he answered you in a friendly way, then don’t be afraid, state your name. It is easiest to start a conversation from this stage if you study at the same institute or work together. Of course, just approaching a person somewhere on the street and making an acquaintance in this way won’t be easy, but it’s always worth trying.

By the way a man will behave during an acquaintance, it will already be clear whether it makes sense to continue communicating. If he is disposed to you, actively supports the conversation, then you can safely continue it.

Talk about an abstract topic

What to talk to a stranger about? About the weather! This is the most commonplace topic, which is usually used in those cases when they do not know what to say, but really want to talk. It is worth noting that this is a great way to start a conversation, but there is one thing – it is immediately clear why you chose it.

It is much easier to start a conversation by asking for help. Indeed, in this case, you are not, as it were, aimed at communication, but simply need some kind of service. For example, if you like a young man while shopping at the supermarket, ask him to help you get the goods from the top shelf or carry the basket to the checkout. While he is helping, start a dialogue, it may be possible to interest him, and the communication will continue.

Give a small compliment

A compliment on your part can be a good and pleasant start to a conversation for a man. For example, you go for a walk with a dog, you see an attractive guy with a beautiful (or not so) dog, just go up to him and praise his pet.

Or if you met a man in a clothing store, you can tell him something pleasant about his style, image. For example, focus on a young man’s jacket or some kind of accessory. Representatives of the stronger sex love praise, as their self-esteem rises through it. Therefore, you have a great chance to continue communication.

Four stages of conversation

The secret to starting and keeping up with the guy you like is to understand and notice how natural conversation moves from one level to the next. There are four stages that people go through when they start dating and communication.

Keeping small conversations about the weather or your surroundings is an important part of the conversation!

Start of conversation

The first phase is known as initiating a conversation. Casual conversation is often an important aspect of getting to know someone. It can include topics such as weather, hobbies, work, school, or comments about events around you. A casual conversation is ideal for starting a conversation because it doesn’t require extensive knowledge of a particular subject. This is an important part of dating because she takes an interest in the other person. In the event that the guy you are interested in leaves when you ask a question or comment on something. Then he tries to say that he is not interested in you, or at the moment he does not have time to communicate.

As your conversation shifts from the initial greeting and starts to pick up steam, it’s important to ask questions. Most open-ended questions start with what, how, and why. Open-ended questions – those that naturally elicit a more thoughtful and detailed response – are the heart of the conversation. Most people enjoy talking about themselves and not about difficult topics when meeting new people. Because they already have answers to many questions. When you ask a person questions about him, he does not need to remember facts or any little things. He just has to show that he knows himself well and is proud of who he is.

Details about yourself

The next step is to exchange facts about each other. When both of you have shown a mutual interest in the conversation, then start sharing details about yourself. Only they shouldn’t be too personal. This communication phase is a good time to ask questions that will help you both establish common interests. For example, you can ask a guy about his profession. Or what he likes to do in his free time. Since each of you will share a little information about yourself, you will definitely find something to talk about in more detail. For example, you might find out that you both love to cook. This will lead to conversation about favorite foods, recipes and places to eat, and so on.

Expressing opinions

The third stage of a successful conversation with a guy you like will involve both of you sharing your thoughts and opinions on various issues. You can talk about politics, sports, or show business. You can express your opinion about current events in the world, or express your point of view on a specific problem. Some people tend to be wary of talking about politics with a stranger. And this is the correct position. But if you feel that a person is okay with this topic, then why not? If you don’t like politics, there are many other topics such as weather, clothing style, animals, cars, etc.

Communication on personal topics

If the conversation flows naturally, then you can move on to more personal topics. For example, start talking about your family or your relationship status. Although not every conversation reaches Level 4, you need to strive for it. Do not hesitate, gain experience, and you will definitely succeed.

Now that you know how to start a conversation with a guy and how to maintain it, you will have a better chance of getting him interested. You should also remember that the easiest way to connect with the man you like is when you are in a positive mood. If you are confident in yourself and you know what to do, then it will be much easier for you to talk to people with anxiety.

How to communicate with people correctly: ways to keep conversations pleasant

Relationships between people are a complex process. It may also happen that the interest of one interlocutor in another will not be mutual. What could be the reason for this and how to prevent this situation from occurring?

There is a genuine interest in the person with whom we find pleasant communication. And it’s not only and not so much in our attitude to the interlocutor, but in his ability to dispose to himself. In articles on this topic, you can often find such advice as “look a person in the eye”, “nod and smile”, “repeat phrases after a person or generalize to prove that you are listening to him.”

American journalist Celeste Hadley, an anchorwoman of a popular radio station in the states, calls such recommendations useless. She believes that there is no point in showing your interlocutor your attention if you are really following the conversation.

To improve communication skills, according to the radio host, any of the ten rules below will help. Celeste claims that you can become a pleasant conversationalist even if you follow at least one of them.

Concentrate on the conversation

Try not to get distracted and focus on one thing. Correct communication requires full concentration on the conversation. Even the habitual shifting of the device from hand to hand can disrupt your concentration. Give up the habit of fiddling with things, especially when talking.

Also try to free your thoughts from any non-relevant information. Let household or work issues that bother you go into standby mode. You will have time to return to them after you finish the conversation. And lastly, if the dialogue is not interesting to you or is simply not appropriate at the moment, interrupt it politely and leave. Communication is not a process in which it will be possible to be present only half.

Do not repeat yourself

Often, in order to be “better” understood, we duplicate information. Try to notice when the desire to express an already said thought in other words takes over. First, it can tire other people. Secondly, when you repeat what has already been voiced, the interlocutor may get the impression that you are treating him with disdain.

Avoid detailing

The interlocutor is interested in you and the topic of the conversation as a whole, but not in details in the form of exact dates, names, etc. In order for the other person to understand what you have in common, you do not need to reduce the conversation to a discussion of the smallest details. Excessive specification contributes to the loss of the essence of the conversation. Omit details.

Be concise

Effective and at the same time pleasant communication is possible between people who keep an open mind, not a mouth. Be attentive to the interlocutor, be prepared to be surprised and surprised. But not just a stream of unnecessary information. Any, even the most important or complex thought can be expressed succinctly.

From the expression “brevity is the sister of talent”, one can deduce the statement that talkativeness is not a sign of great intelligence. If you think that in order to seem interesting and win over the interlocutor, you need to be wordy, forget about it once and for all.

Listen to the interlocutor

And in continuation of the topic of attentiveness, it is worth highlighting the ability to listen as a separate item. Many people like to talk more. It helps to increase self-esteem, gives a feeling of power (“I’m in the spotlight”).

In addition, a person spends additional strength and energy to follow someone else’s speech. But if you do not listen to the interlocutor, the dialogue does not take place. It turns out something like voicing incoherent sentences by two people who are in the same place.

Leave small talk to losers

Recently, scientists have found that people yawn three times more intensely when the interlocutor tells them that “now and winter is coming.” Okay, okay, scientists haven’t figured out anything like that yet. But they will probably find out soon, because small talk on general topics makes the interlocutor feel that, firstly, you are boring, and secondly, you find him boring at the same time.

Look for a topic for conversation here and now. For example, if the interlocutor (we have forgotten for a long time about the existence of girls, that is, interlocutors) has a glass with a martini and an olive in his hands, ask: “Do you know that the pits of an olive are an excellent absorbent and prevents early intoxication?”

Go on the offensive

Immediately ask for the opinion of the interlocutor on a particular issue. Ask directly: “How do you feel about the introduction to the Duma of the bill banning olives in martinis?” Each person has an opinion on this or that matter. And a person is very flattering when people are interested in this opinion.

Raise your interlocutor

Ask your interlocutor for advice. “Do you think I should put my fifth olive in my martini or four will be enough?” Advice differs from opinion in that you are not just interested in the interlocutor – you ask him to influence your life. And this is a qualitatively new level of trust.

The interlocutor should be doubly pleasant. Well, or he will panic from the responsibility that you want to assign to him, and, having spilled a martini, will run out of the room.

What questions should you start a conversation with a guy with?

There are situations when a guy is not in the mood to start a conversation or is simply embarrassed to write (call) first. Solving such problems will be a simple matter if you show sensitivity and attentiveness to him, since, perhaps, he is not sure of mutual sympathy.

Indicative list of questions for dialogue:

What’s your mood today?
At the moment I am frozen. And you?
How was your journey from work to home?
Do you run in the morning?
How can I make you happy?
Melancholy and sadness rolled over. Can you recommend a great movie?
What events have you had today?
Did you go to lunch? What goodies have you tried?
Maybe you know what happened to …?

After sending a message, you should not wait for an instant response, since he also has his own life, affairs, work. Don’t be too intrusive by constantly sending letters. If you are interested in him, he will definitely respond in response.

Overview of topics for dialogue with a young person: a collection of various questions

When a guy does answer your letter, it is highly discouraged to burst into his personal space with too personal, tricky questions. The conversation should be tied up gradually, keeping the boundaries of what is permitted.

Below is a list of a wide variety of questions, thanks to which you can gradually gain the confidence of a young man and win over:

What activities do you prefer to do during your free hours?
Do you have a brother or sister?
What’s your favorite movie?
Where do you prefer to watch it: at home or in a cinema?
You like to read books? If so, what is your favorite genre of literature?
Do you consider yourself one of those people who travel often?
Imagine yourself as the hero of the fairy tale “Goldfish”. What 3 cherished wishes would you make?
What music genre do you prefer? Can you play anything?
Do you like to drive a car at high speeds?
If you have a favorite dish, what is it?
How do you get up in the morning?
Do you have a dream to become famous?
Do you have close friends? What are they?
What is your hobby?
What is your opinion on photographing yourself? Do you like taking pictures?
Is there a favorite celebration? If so, which one?
How do you improve your mood?
In childhood, peers did not address you by name?
Does your pet live with you?
How much time do you spend on computer games?
What do your mom and dad prefer to do?
Do you have a cherished dream?
What is your attitude to bad habits?
Are you superstitious?
What kind of sport do you prefer?

So the young man is involved in the conversation. You were able to interest him. He maintains a dialogue, and besides, asks questions himself! What else is worth asking to find out his views on important things?

List of questions for a guy about relationships with girls

This is a very important list, since from it a person is revealed in a new way and shows his attitude towards the opposite sex. Girls who are interested in a serious relationship with a certain guy should carefully consider his answers.

But before asking a young man about his attitude towards ladies, you must follow the following recommendations:

pre-arrange the guy to yourself;
find a common thread of the conversation;
smoothly bring the guy to the right question;
ask not a stream of questions, but distracted by the discussion of a topic.

List of questions for the guy:

What professional area should your chosen one occupy?
What is your attitude towards partner infidelity?
Have you forgotten your very first love?
What should a modern young lady be like: stay at home or engage in self-development and build a career?
What is your attitude towards those who dared to be the first to tell about their sympathy?
Have you dealt with non-reciprocal feelings?
Are you in love?
Can you classify yourself as a romantic person?
What are your thoughts on internet dating?
What qualities are most valuable to you in women?
Is there love from the first second?
What mistake do you think could be fatal in a relationship?
Can there be friendly relations with the opposite sex?
Will your behavior be influenced by the opinion of your friends towards the girl?
Who do you think needs to be the first to compromise in a relationship?

If you managed to ask how he feels about love and women in general, and you are satisfied with it, you can continue to look closely at the guy. Perhaps he is exactly who you are looking for.

List of funny questions for a guy

It is worth remembering that a serious conversation cannot be long, as it tires and strains all the participants in the conversation. It is recommended to use humor in the dialogue, this will help relieve unnecessary stress and cheer up the interlocutors.

The following questions will help to rise to the positive wave:

What do you usually do with an alarm clock that rings in the morning?
What color would you dare to paint your refrigerator?
Have you ever walked the city streets in one robe?
Do you have a dream to ride white clouds?
How do you usually fold your socks?
Jumping over puddles?
What song do you sing the most while taking a shower?
Do you like the young man whom you see in the mirror every day?
Imagine that I have 2 invitations to the spaceship. Will you agree to fly with me?

By correspondence Vkontakte

What to talk to the pen guy about? Vkontakte is the most popular social network in Russia. Almost everyone on this site has an account, and some have more than one. Most online dating takes place here, and not through special services where lonely hearts gather. You liked the man’s profile, but you don’t know what to write to him?

Chatting on the Internet is much easier than chatting live. Messaging is a great platform to test communication if you are too shy to meet men, and the best option for maintaining long-distance relationships.

On the web, you can write about anything. When a person does not see the face of the interlocutor, it is easier for him to open up. If a girl is not used to answering quickly, then the Internet gives time to think about the answer, since the exchange of messages is a process stretched out in time.

Here is a list of twenty questions to ask both guys you know and those you are texting for the first time. They are suitable not only for communication via social networks, but also for ordinary conversation via SMS.

What he does or what he plans to become.
What are his favorite hobbies and interests.
What films does he prefer to watch.
What genre of music does he like and what bands does he like.
Does he like to cook. If so, what are your favorite dishes?
What cities or countries he visited. Where he liked the most and why.
How does he imagine himself in ten years.
What is he dreaming about now.
What is his most vivid childhood memory.
How does he feel about pets and did he have any favorite pets as a child?
What he prefers: dancing in a noisy club or hiking, rafting on the river, picnic in nature.
Does he love books. If so, which ones.
Does he have friends. What they love to do together.
Does he have a sister or a brother. What kind of relationship they have.
Whether he served in the army or is just planning.
How does he relate to sports.
Does he like to travel outside the city.
What is the most important thing in life for him.
If he could go to any corner of the world, then where would he go.
There were serious relationships in his life and whether he communicates with exes.

It is best to ask questions in the order in which they are located. Gradually, the person will open up in the conversation, so each question becomes a little more frank. Universal topics for conversation can be alternated with jokes and stories about funny moments from life, so that the interlocutor does not feel like a person under investigation during interrogation and does not start to get bored. Remember to keep the conversation going with stories about yourself to please the man.

By phone

Talking on the phone is the second stage of acquaintance, which can be called training before real live communication. Building a dialogue with a stranger is always difficult. What can you talk to him about if you barely know each other? To avoid awkward pauses, we recommend that you try the correspondence first. Only when messages can no longer satisfy your desire to communicate, it is worth moving on to telephone conversations.

After the banal “hello”, you can ask a couple of universal questions from the list:

How was his day today.
Has he heard of a recent event. If so, how does he feel about it.
What is he planning to do this weekend.
Which celebrity he likes best and why.
How would he act in a given situation.
Does his family have any interesting customs or traditions?
Does he plan to go on vacation this year.
What subjects at school did he like the most?
Does he have childhood friends. Do they still maintain a relationship.
How it relieves accumulated stress.
What goals has he set for himself for the next few years.
Does he have any idols. Why does he want to be like these people.
What is his favorite season.
How does he feel about loneliness.
There were serious relationships in his life and how he experienced parting.
What he dreamed of when he was a boy.
What is his relationship with friends.
If there was more free time, what would he spend it on?
Does he know how to swim. If so, how did you learn.
How often his whole family gathers for the holidays.
In a telephone conversation, it is also necessary not only to listen, so that the dialogue does not turn into a monologue. The secret of a soulful conversation is mutual interest. Such communication is somewhat reminiscent of a set on a tennis court, when one serves the ball, the other hits it and returns the serve.

On a walk

Striking up a conversation while walking is both easier and more difficult than talking on the phone or via social media. A girl may just feel embarrassed when she is next to a guy.

The advantages of such communication are that you can see how the interlocutor reacts to this or that question. This will allow you to quickly adjust to him and choose the right direction for the conversation.

While you are walking, you have a unique opportunity to show that you are an intelligent conversationalist who knows how to listen. For a short walk, you can learn a lot about a guy’s past and find out his plans for the future. Do not miss this chance.

Topics for conversation with a guy while walking around the city:

Does he like his chosen profession?
Where he would like to go.
Can he call himself a romantic.
What he was like as a child.
The negative attitude of the family towards his choice of a girl can affect his opinion.
He knows how to concede in an argument.
He forgives wrongdoing and quarrels or never compromises.
How does he relate to women who take the initiative.
How he copes with difficulties.
I would like him to fix something in his life.
He often gets involved in conflicts.
Whether there were real enemies or rivals in his life.
He believes that the ends justify the means.
What attracts him to people.
What dreams does he plan to turn into reality in the near future?
On which he spent the first money he earned.
What he dreams of doing.
What does he mean by the word love.
Does he believe in love at first sight?
I could live with one person all my life.

Sources used and useful links on the topic: https://cosmeton.ru/otnosheniya/kak-obshchatsya-s-parnem.html https://love-is.org/kak-nachat-razgovor-s-parnem/ https: / /mistersmile.ru/kak-nachat-obshchenie-s-parnem/ https://onelove.su/kak-nachat-razgovor-s-parnem/ https://otnoshenij.net/kak-samoy-nachat-razgovor-s -parnem https://psikhologia.com/kak-nachat-razgovor-s-parnem.html https://znaniyaetosila.ru/kak-pravilno-obschatsya-s-lyudmi-chtoby-oni-k-tebe-tyanulis/ https: //www.MaximOnline.ru/skills/lifehacking/_article/how-to-start-conversation/ https://more-vsego.net/o-chem-pogovorit-s-parnem-130-interesnyh-tem.html https://omambe.ru/sovet/o-chem-pogovorit-s-parnem-150-tem

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